In Loving Kindness

When I started photography, it was just a hobby. Something to get me out of the house; something to keep me entertained. Photography was just for fun. It didn’t really matter whether people liked my photos or not. It didn’t matter because I had nothing to lose. If someone didn’t like my work, I could just waive it off and say “oh, it’s just a project I was doing for fun.”

After my mom got tendonitis, she gave me her camera, which became my first DSLR and inspired me to start doing photography. 

After my mom got tendonitis, she gave me her camera, which became my first DSLR and inspired me to start doing photography. 

Well, it’s no big secret that I really love photography. In fact, it’s become such a big part of my life that I can’t really hide behind the whole “oh-it’s-just-for-fun” thing anymore. If someone didn’t like my work and was mean to me about it, I have nothing to hide behind.

 

To be honest, since going pro, it kinda got a lot scarier to share my work. Thoughts like “what if no one likes what I share?” or “what if I make no money?” or the worst yet “what if people are actually laughing at me?” All these thoughts would haunt me every time I clicked that dreadful “share” button.

 

I know for a lot of us who do creative work, vulnerability can be SO excruciatingly painful. And it’s true, we all go through it. But I want to say something about how much I am grateful for it. I am grateful for excruciating vulnerability because they are opportunities for me to grow and learn about my self-worth. If everything came easy to me and success came to me every time I hit that “share” button, I think I would be like a spoiled kid who got everything I wanted without knowing what it means to wait for it.

 

For the last bit, I know that I’ve only really just begun my adventure as a photographer and I have so much ahead of me. But I believe that before I get published on magazines or become world-renowned, I am already successful because I know the love of God. Thank goodness I didn’t listen to the mockers, the shamers, and the gremlins, because I probably would have quit a long time ago if I had. Thank goodness that I have God to remind me how faithful He is and how he supports me in loving kindness.

I am already successful because I know the love of God. 

I am already successful because I know the love of God.