When I started photography, it was just a hobby. Something to get me out of the house; something to keep me entertained. Photography was just for fun. It didn’t really matter whether people liked my photos or not. It didn’t matter because I had nothing to lose. If someone didn’t like my work, I could just waive it off and say “oh, it’s just a project I was doing for fun.”
Well, it’s no big secret that I really love photography. In fact, it’s become such a big part of my life that I can’t really hide behind the whole “oh-it’s-just-for-fun” thing anymore. If someone didn’t like my work and was mean to me about it, I have nothing to hide behind.
To be honest, since going pro, it kinda got a lot scarier to share my work. Thoughts like “what if no one likes what I share?” or “what if I make no money?” or the worst yet “what if people are actually laughing at me?” All these thoughts would haunt me every time I clicked that dreadful “share” button.
I know for a lot of us who do creative work, vulnerability can be SO excruciatingly painful. And it’s true, we all go through it. But I want to say something about how much I am grateful for it. I am grateful for excruciating vulnerability because they are opportunities for me to grow and learn about my self-worth. If everything came easy to me and success came to me every time I hit that “share” button, I think I would be like a spoiled kid who got everything I wanted without knowing what it means to wait for it.
For the last bit, I know that I’ve only really just begun my adventure as a photographer and I have so much ahead of me. But I believe that before I get published on magazines or become world-renowned, I am already successful because I know the love of God. Thank goodness I didn’t listen to the mockers, the shamers, and the gremlins, because I probably would have quit a long time ago if I had. Thank goodness that I have God to remind me how faithful He is and how he supports me in loving kindness.